cuss words and critiques

i seem to have an ailment worse than common flu. it's called not-wanting-to-leave-the-house-in-case-i-might-not-be-indie-enough-for-this-city-or-perhaps-nobody-will-ever-want-to-publish-my-book fever. i suggest you do not come closer, as it may be contagious.

if i could try and diagnose myself i'd say i'm suffering from a cold chill with a boat of despair, due to a lapse in self-confidence. once again i do stress that you do NOT come near me. i might just depress you and you may want to slap some sense into me.

this city is too much for me at times.in fact, it is so infectious, so conscious, so vain and insecure and utterly RADICAL that i can only be in it for a short period of time before saying i need to go home and collect myself. there's just so much to see. so much to buy, eat, drink, hear. there are also thousands of others just like me who also want a piece of it. a biiig, fat piece of it too, and as swallowed as i am, i cannot help feeling more and more constricted every day. this generation is a great contest for the top spot. we awesome people are perhaps not so awesome, really. i think we should all stop what we are doing and descend. after all, we're all just people. people trying, people striving, people trying to find out who we are and secretly, perhaps when you're alone and not surrounded by awesomeness, you may feel, 'gosh. do i make the cut? am i really as awesome as the next person? or is this one big sham that i, the non-conformist extraordinaire, am conforming to?'

conform to non-conformism my friends. make an appearence and celebrate yourselves. but do not forget reverence.