Human relationships fascinate me. The love hate relationship between two people who won’t admit their attraction for one another; a domestic dispute between two people in love; the good girl from Park Avenue and the street boy; the untamable shrew wooed by the rugged stranger; the misdirected burnout who takes Mary Jane to the prom. The bad girl over the good girl, it seems.
I’m still not self-actualized; still, I have such a hella way to go. But my perspectives have been breathed into, somehow. And I’ll get back, slowly, pull myself together.
I couldn’t escape my own thoughts, feeling INside, looking only at my own self and what I felt of the world. Why, this world is so much magnified, 10 times at least, because everything I see is intensified. I must be the most self-absorbed person I’ve ever met.
People say, they say that it’s just a phase. They tell me to act my age. Well I am.
Things seem to be consuming me. It isn't any wonder that I feel like taking two steps backwards, and then perhaps another two, and then throwing up my hands and saying that I have come now to the end. I am not well enough, not smart enough, or beautiful enough, together enough, to love enough, to give enough. Enough. Enough, not enough.
I feel more than ever that there is something wrong with me. Why am I still alone? I guess I'm just torturing myself wondering when my life is going to start.