The geek: "I’m quarantining your virus out of my system."
The gleek: "Mercedes, I’m gay."
The jock: "We’ve been having a losing season, and I’m quitting the team."
The non-conformist: "I’m trying out for the cheerleading squad."
The trekkie: "Live long and prosper. Just not with me."
The vampire: "I want to be with someone more…tan."
The pirate: "The rum is gone."
The overachiever: "I just need to spend more time slacking off, you know?"
The clinger: "I have ebola. And it's highly contagious."
The theater nerd: "The curtain has closed on the stage of our affair."
The foreign exchange student: "I’m having you deported."
The werewolf: Why would anyone want to break up with a werewolf? They have jetpacks!
The band dork: We started out with perfect pitch, but now I think we've gone a bit flat.
The cheerleader: the pep has gone out of our relationship
The HP fan: I'm sorry, Romilda, but your love potion has worn off
The redneck: Darlin', this relationship is going over like a turd in a punch bowl.
The twihard: Edward's not real and neither was this.
original article here here
p.s. who breaks up with a pirate? the rum would never run out if i had a pirate in my crew if you know what i mean...